Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Happy Hallowed Eve

Weird Goings On on Political Hallowed Eve
Two old familiar (I emphasize the "liar" in that word) faces came out wearing their scariest Hollowhead...er-ah, I mean Halloween costumes, today.

First, VietNam-Swift Boat hero, John "Loser" Kerry, got pissed off at Tony Snow--our "president's" lapdog press secretary--for misinterpreting what John said was a "botched" joke on his part. Here's the joke as reported or reedited by NBC or one of those toady network dworks, but anyway, here's the joke:

A source close to Kerry tells NBC News that he was trying to make a "tough and honest joke" about Bush and that in the process he omitted two words which changed the intended meaning. Per the source, Kerry meant to say that he can't "overstress the importance of a great education" and that "if you don't study, if you aren't smart, if you're intellectually lazy... You end up getting us stuck in a war in Iraq." Kerry mistakenly dropped the "getting us" from his initial remarks.

Well, the Internet Libs are tooting old Kerry's horn like he's finally out and standing on his true hindlegs instead of his comfy Heinz-fortune legs--those he stood on when he had a real chance to combat Georgie Porgie the vote-stealin' phony president--our never-honestly-elected president and our first president ever to be appointed to office by the Supreme Court--a court led by Master John Bircher William Remquist from that glorious whacked out State of Arizona, who has since been stricken with cancer and taken away from us. Boo-hoo. Yep, so Loser Kerry had his chance--where was he then. God-damn, he didn't lose by much and people were hollering at him, "Hey, John, it's VietNam all over again, you idiot, come on, combat this AWOL jerk!!" Instead, John conceded he lost and went to bed in his Heinz-paid-for mansion before the clock struck eleven. Same as old Global Warmedover Al Gore did when he wimped out against the Drugstore Cowboy and Executioner whose highest elected office so far has been goobernor of Texas--and wow, what a record that silly bastard left behind in backwarder that backwards Texas. Hey, I can talk about Texas; I'm one of 'em.

Kerry is so feeble. His attack was as clownish as Georgie Porgie's "nanner-nanner" response, which was aired on all the god-damn networks, though just like NBC did in the above excerpt, Kerry's statement wasn't broadcast at all but was paraphrased.

Kerry is a joke himself. God he's a loser. Why won't people accept that these war veterans are nuts? John McCain is nutty as a fruitcake, but who wouldn't be who went through the torture he went through--torture, which ironically, he now supports--I say put John back in a tiger cage; seems, just like our government, he didn't learn a GD thing from his VietNam War experience--just used it to get himself a successful, well-paid job in politics; why, that's the same as J0hn "Loser" Kerry--except John was already rich as sin and then married the widow of old Catchup King Charlie Heinz--a babe who tried to come on tough rich bitch cookie and ended up ridiculed by the skankiest of Repugnican bimbos.

Oh if the tough talking (he talks like he does have a mouth full of spent shells) Kerry were only still on active duty. I say put him in the tiger cage with McCain.

I'm sorry; he and Al Gore, dammit, they had a chance and they chickened out against this herd of human-animal hybrids who have confiscated We the People's rights and our money. Social Security is in trouble; it sure is, because Georgie Porgie's borrowing it all to pay for his wars.

I only heard a fragment of Cowboy Georgie Porgie's AWOL-hero retort to Mumbles Kerry's bumbled joke but what I heard was so child-like and off-the-wall--I mean, come on, you rich bastards; go live in your gated communities and leave us the F alone.

Oh the poor Dumbocrats. Eight days to the election and Kerry's hurt feelings are so far the only true growling I heard aimed at Georgie Porgie's Chihuahua puppy ears. Hillary's braggin' about saving kids from porn or somesuch total crap bullshit--Hillary doesn't say much about Georgie Porgie stealing two elections; bailing out to the safety of the SAC base in Nebraska while our country was under attack--even while Washington, District of Corruption, was under the same attack; totally fabricating a reason to attack Iraq, a country that had nothing to do with whoever attacked us on 9/11--I to this day still can't see why we started a war-we-couldn't-finish in Afghanistan, a country that also had nothing to do with 9/11, except Georgie Porgie and Slick Willie claim the Taliban were hiding and aiding Bin Laden, a creation of our own CIA; nothing to contradict Bush's claiming our economy is growing by leaps and bounds when our economy, the one not based on the Dow Jones Average and not on the GNP but the one based on an outrageous national debt and a mounting interest bill--most of which we owe to Commie China, good ole heart of democracy Saudi Arabia, is headed for the doldrums. Bush knows we need that oil in Iraq worse than ever now. That's the gold in his cross of gold.

Bush is a joke.

I'm not gonna vote. I'm too dignified to appear at a polling place. OK, I'll vote if I get to wear one of those Richard Nixon masks? Or how about a Dick Cheney mask? Whooo, that's a scary one. Carry a loaded shotgun when you're wearing that mask. Or how about a Condo-Leasing Rice mask--kind'a dyke her up a bit, dig? Or how about a Karl Rove mask? With that baldhead gleaming silvery in the moonlight. Or how about an Arnold Schwarzenegger mask---you could borrow Prince Harry's full-dress Nazi uniform and really be authentically scary. I'll vote with my powers of persuasion.

They're all the same. I would sweep the whole lot of 'em out of Washington--send all of 'em, even their pages and limo drivers and private chefs and trainers and shit, off to Gitmo or Dubai--or give 'em all one-way Greyhound tickets back to Podunk and Blabberville and Hicksville and Yahoo City--let 'em go back to being ambulance-chasing attorneys, double-booking CPAs, or pest controllers.

Idiots rule us and want to rule us.

Millionaires versus millionaires. All of 'em wanting to add another couple'a million to their already overflowing stolen coffers. Just think, once a lowly first lady from hillbilly Arkansas was Hillary RodHAM Clinton--down thar in little ole Little Rock where the most she ever made was that 75,000 bucks she made on that hot tip in the commodities market she got from one of her admirers down thar in the Rose Law Firm. Now, that little ole first lady/cum Senator is now a multimillionaire--her book deals made her rich if not her campaign finance chest--you ever read any of her stupid books? Not worth reading; same as Slick Willie's multimillion-dollar-earning contribution to literature. Not worth reading. Gobbly-gook. Do you speak Gobbly-gook? No, I didn't think so; so that's why you don't understand any of these politicians, you don't understand Gobbly-gook.

Hey, how about thegrowlingwolf for President in 2008?

or Treat...

for The Daily Growler

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