So the Iraq Parliament has passed the bill overwhelmingly giving their oil away to a consortium of old-time Standard Oil companies, the reasons the Limeys fought so hard against the Dullheaded Turks back in those glorious days when the Union Jack waved so royally and fairly and democratically over all the world, bringing, I say, civilisation to the woggies, the wooly-boolies, the yellow peril, the White Man's burden, the Hottentots, the Bantu, the Pygmies, the Bushmen, the bloody Boors, the shanty Irish, the froggies, yassuh, yassuh, yassuh, with the sun never setting on the glorious Empire and the dandy ladies who were their queenies and the whacko Nazi-kin Prussian men that consorted with those queenies and one of those queenies's worthless sons and his anemic offspring, one of which abandoned the throne for a commoner and the other who sympathized with Nazis, his relatives, during WWII, he and Pope Pius over in Nazi Rome--ah, it's all so vellie British still, isn't it?--and yet Tony "the Coward" Blair is pulling out of Iraq--"Mission Accomplished," he says, passing his losing baton on to the Great Decider as he rereads his Georgie Porgie-signed copy of My Pet Goat for the fifth time. "Blimey, I still don't see how President Bush developed his winning tactics in Iraq and Afghanistan out of this damn kids's book, blimey!" Then he was heard rationalizing, "I see no military sense in this damn book, though I can't get that bloody nanny off me bloody mind; I mean, check her out, lads, I swear on me ole mother, she's hotter than the Mizzez Blair...hell, she's hotter than Helen Mirin...heh, heh--sorry, fellow Brits, I've been hanging around Georgie Porgie Bush, the phony American Colony president, too much; I'm developing his sense of humour, don't you see, old twits?"
So, hell, now all of we analysts here at The Daily Growler agree that soon Bushy Baby will announce that the War in Iraq is a success, the Iraqi numbskulls can now take over and finish their bloody civil war--except we're now supplying Al-Qaida with weapons to use against our enemy in Iraq, whoever the hell that is now. It's for certain our goofy soldiers can't tell who's the enemy and who's not. "Towelheads all look a F-ing alike to me, " said Sergeant Billy Buck Lambthrob of Oozlin', Iowa. "I see a towelhead, I shoot first and ask which side of Mohammad's dick he's suckin' later. Hell, sometimes it's kind'a fun. 'Sides, I always did like handling guns and killing dumb animals--I mean, these towelheads, they're just dumb animals to an old corn-fed boy like me." "Gee, kid, I like your spunk. I just hope you don't get a couple of your limbs shot off or your skull dented by shrapnel or somethin' and if you do, I hope they don't send you to Walter Reed when you get home...er, if you get home."
So now, you see, Bushy Boy will announce the Mission is now finally accomplished--you see, he's not only the master of Decision but he's also the master of Deceit, don't ya see? You see, that "Mission Accomplished" bullshit out in San Diego Harbor was to throw Al Qaida off guard. Get it? They thought, "Aha, Bin Laden Brother Georgie Porgie Bandar Bush did trick job on we Al Qaida. Caught us with our guard down and god-damn beat us at our own game. We are now going to have to trot out our Osama actor--remember all of our Saddam Hussein doubles and actors and shit we pulled on your stupid asses?--oh we get big laugh out of that--'Hey, stupid dick, American, Saddam's still alive, look, there's five of him overthere.' Hah-hah, we get big laughs out of watching Georgie Porgie Bandar Bush acting like he's tough motherfucker. 'Bring him on!' Hot damn, I could be on American stage as funny man. Hey, American comedy clubs, you need funny Sunni on your teevee funny shows? How about Bin Loony the Sunni. We joke of course."
So here's the scenario. Bush declares the War in Iraq over. He announces he's turning security and running of the country over to the Iraqi Parliament and Army (Hah!). But, of course, he'll have to leave about 50,000 troops there--that's the normal amount of troops we leave in countries we make dependencies, like South Korea--there are 50,000 troops in South Korea. There were 50,000 troops in the Philippines after WWII and then the Viet Nam War when the Filipinos kicked our asses out. There are probably 50,000 US troops in Germany. Italy I don't know, but of course we do have troops in Italy--though Italy wants to kick us out. Why we have troops in 50,000-troop batches all over the world, even in Central Asia--we used to have a big base at Ankara, Turkey; you don't hear much about that anymore. Of course there are probably 50,000 of our troops in Bosnia, Serbia, the new Yugo, whatever the hell it's called--interesting how Albania, a commie country, and Montenegro, once the mountainous home of the Greek commies that Hairy Ass Truman sent the Marines to Athens to quell right after he desegregated the army, are members of the Coalition of Fools. And do you know why Hairy Ass Truman desegregated the armed forces, don't you? Like you already know that Hairy Ass would have never been elected to Congress without the Kansas City black vote. After the KC party boss told him if he wanted to win, he'd better get his little guy ass down to Darkie Town, which Hairy did and the black vote got him sent to Congress. Of course, after WWII, our armed forces were pretty beat up; we needed all the fresh blood we could get--remember, Hairy had a little Police Action in store for us in the future as the domino theory was getting trumpeted and the commies were marchin' in to take over the freedom-loving country of Korea. John Foster Dullass predicted all those Southeast Asian countries would fall like a line of dominos if we allowed the Commies to take them over. Remember, Lyin' Ass, Tricky Ass, Tricky Dick Nixon saying we had to bomb all those countries back to the stone age, especially Hanoi--on which Nixon even boldly discussed dropping nukes--and Cambodia--and Laos--and Nixon sent his swift boat boys over those borders in preemptive attacks--oh hail our great Chief Tricky Dick Nixon and his alcoholic wife Pat. "I got it down Pat, boys, so come on now, on your knees, pray with me, even you Henry, you Jewboy, on your knees."
Hairy Ass Truman had no compunction about dropping two Atomic Bombs on already beaten Japan; do you think Georgie Porgie will have any compunction about dropping some nukes on Iran? Hell no. He's going into Iran. We have some payback against those bastards; remember, they captured patriotic Americans and held 'em hostage back in them days when gas prices tripled and the price of meat tripled and rents tripled in the country. Remember those days; remember gasoline lines at filling stations? People were killing for a gallon of gas for their gas guzzlers--not the Wolf Man, dammit, I drove a Gremlin in those days. You don't remember those days, back in the late seventies--the hostages were taken on Jimmy "Peanut Boy" Carter's reign (the oil companies hated Jimmy Carter; he's the one that put the Windfall Profits Tax on their asses) and remember how stupidly inanely our armed forces tried to rescue those poor bastards--some of them probably were spies--and then remember how suddenly Ronnie the Raygun, the man who could fly from New York to Tokyo in 3 and 1/2 hours, did some dealmaking with the Iranians, and then why lookie there, old Pappy Bush was the Vice-chairman of underhanded tricks and bamboozling (Pappy was also head of the CIA once) then? And, son of a bitch, there was Unka Dick there, too; and Rummy Rumsfeld...oh my God, it's the same jokers. OIL, OIL, OIL, as I've been growling at the meanest level of my growling for over 300 posts now--it's all about oil; these are all rich-off-oil men, even Unka Dick; Halliburton is a company that has always been an oil well service company, a tooling outfit, out of Ardmore, By Gawd, Okie-homa--they made their fortunes off the stolen oil properties of the Native Americans of Oklahoma Indian Territory back in the days of the wildest of oil times! All of Pappy's West Texas life was based on oil in the Perminan Basin out in far West Texas, once one of the richest oilfields in the world until these greedy bastards milked it not dry but milked all the top gas off of the deep oil and now the oil is so deep, it's too expensive to drill and it's too expensive to pump oil up from that depth, all those oil and gas wells out there in those old oilfields were capped. Check out oil prices, they're still based on West Texas crude prices.
I grew up with oilmen. You did not get successful in the oil business by being above board. Shenanigans were the standard in the oil business in West Texas and East Texas--slanted drilling for instance; or putting in a pipeline at night from your neighbor's storage tanks into your storage tanks--siphoning.
My mother and dad had a couple who had been their friends since they'd gone to high school together. He raised beautiful Hereford cattle on his small ranch west of town; she ran a hat shop in the town's best department store. One day, a Standard Oil geologist came to this couples home and said they had been taking samples on their land and possibilities of oil looked good and that a SOHIO agent would be calling on them--and he did, coming down from New York City one weekend, checkbook in hand, lease-deal in hand, mineral rights transfer in hand--and at the end of that conversation, this couple, my mom and dad's old pals, were worth more money than the budget of nearly every city and town in that part of the world. The woman once showed my mother a dividend check from SOHIO for 100,000 US smackers, and she said in a whisper, "We get two of these a month!."
I grew up with the sons and daughters of oilmen. I've dated girls whose fathers were surely multimillionaires; two of my best friends's fathers were oilmen-ranchers, one of my friends inheriting while he was in high school a 1600-acre Hereford working ranch as his part of his father's trust. When this kid got twenty-one, I'm sure he became a millionaire--and he was a great friend, too; not at all a spoiled brat like Georgie Porgie--I mean, this guy loved cattle and ranching--he drove army surplus Jeeps and wore pegged jeans and dirty boots like the rest of us--what a life! And all of these guys were really and truly worthless--in terms of what they were going to do, like going to college: they didn't give a shit; most of them didn't have to go to college. Oilmen. Petroleum clubs. Geologists. Suppliers. Well Testers. Red Adair, hell, he was from Odessa, Texas, where Pappy and Mammy Bush migrated to after Pappy was discharged out of the Air Force--remember, he bailed out of his "failed" mission before all his troops were out of the plane--Pappy perhaps forgot the rules momentarily. At least, Bootlegger Joe Kennedy sacrificed his favorite son in that wahr!
So Georgie Porgie leaves 50,000 dog soldiers and jarheads in Iraq--to, of course, join Blackwater in guarding the oilfields and the pumping stations--and also, somebody has to guard the fashionable Green Zone, the world's largest Embassy--our Embassy in the United States Dependency of Iraq (I'm sure Halliburton has a private army stationed there, too).
Forget Afghanistan? Oh hell no, Bushy Boy is sending some more poor ole tired dog soldiers and jarheads overthere, too--a little surge there, but a necessary surge since we are the NATO forces there--such a joke.
OK, so here's the plan. He's got the ships in place around Iran's coastline--especially a couple of big hot-damn aircraft carriers--and you know what they use aircraft carriers for, don't ya? And you see, we haven't used our Navy and Air Force up yet like we have the Army and the Gyrenes, so we have plenty of equipment and cannon fodder in those brances to level Tehran--what'a you think--WWIII maybe? Hot damn, the Christian Juju Bead crowd is jumping up and down and shoutin' glory--it means Armegeddon. Jesus is coming. It's 11:59...it's nearly that Midnight Hour! Praise the Lard and Holy Hog. Hot damn, blood up to the bellies of the horses the armies are going to be riding--I suppose Iraq and Afghanistan have used up all our combustible engine vehicles; it's time to bring the Calvary...oops, I mean the Cavalry back. Lighthorse Georgie Porgie Bush the Great Decider could decide just to flatten Baghdad with a minor nuke as he turns his ass on Iraq and then, boogie with a 100,000 or so dogs and jarheads right on over into Eye-ran! Those devils. Those sorry sons of Islamic bitches; why they want to destroy our precious Dependency of Israel. Such bullshit, though it really isn't a joke.
Horrible bombings in Baghdad yesterday and today. They went totally unreported. I mean, we had to know about the Oscars, that phony-baloney Hollywood ballyhoo bullshit. Hell, John Wayne, one of the cornballest actors ever won an Academy Award. Or how 'bout Mumbles Bogart; he wasn't a great actor, but he won an Academy Award. Need I mention Katie Hepburn? She won one--"Spence! Spence! I need you to batter me around or else I'm going to bang Howard Hughes on his yacht." Such bullshit.
And as for Al Gore now being the poster boy for the Liberals--come on, he's a god-damn loser; the Dumbos always pick the WRONG candidates--they always do--look at Gore-Lieberman!!! Look at Kerry-Edwards!!! Losers. Hillbilly Hillary and Obama? Never. First of all, Hillary's a racist probably and second she's a controlled numbskull, controlled by numbskull Howard Dean and her pork-porking husband, Slick Willie. Why, she's even using Slick Willie-isms now. Why she's talking about everything except what's everything on Americans's minds--Get us the hell out of these god-damn WARS. Put these crooks in prison or in the heavy heart-attack zone like old Kenny Boy Lay ended up in. What a bunch dumb ruthless bastards--which means we in this country must be a bunch of really dumb ruthless bastards!
Not I, said thegrowlingwolf gnawing away at a fresh-killed young elkling's meaty thigh bone readying to howl at that old Bilbao Moon--"I must have whiskey or I die...." How quickly Kurt Weill has been forgotten.
So it looks like the scenario is: 50,000 troops left to guard the oilfields, the pipe lines, the pumping stations, and the Green Zone. The rest of the 100,000--100,000 there already to slip into Iran and start a civil war there--oh yes, plus the 20,000 troops coming over to participate in the surge--plus another, you know, 20 or so thousand he'll just sneak in overthere--who the hell's countin'?--Bushy Boy said "40,000" in one of those War speeches that nobody listened to or remembered even if they did listen.
It's all laid out for you in Pappy Bush's famous "New World Order and Thousand Points of Life" speech. Little Bush Baby spoiled brat rich oilman's son phony president knows it by heart. Oops, I forgot, he ain't got no heart, has he? Maybe he's pumping off Unka Dick's programmed heart.
thegrowlingwolf
for The Daily Growler
What's This: The Crux of Pappy's New World Order Speech---Yahooooo!
Our commitment to peace in the Middle East does not end with the liberation of Kuwait. So tonight let me outline four key challenges to be met. First, we must work together to create shared security arrangements in the region. Our friends and allies in the Middle East recognise that they will bear the bulk of the responsibility for regional security. But we want them to know that just as we stood with them to repel aggression, so now America stands ready to work with them to secure the peace. This does not mean stationing US ground forces on the Arabian Peninsula, but it does mean American participation in joint exercises involving both air and ground forces. It means maintaining a capable US naval presence in the region, just as we have for over 40 years. Let it be clear: our vital national interests depend on a stable and secure Gulf. Second, we must act to control the proliferation of weapons of mass destruction and the missiles used to deliver them. It would be tragic if the nations of the Middle East and Persian Gulf were now, in the wake of war, to embark on a new arms race. Iraq requires special vigilance. Until Iraq convinces the world of its peaceful intentions – that its leaders will not use new revenues to re-arm and rebuild its menacing war machine – Iraq must not have access to the instruments of war. And third, we must work to create new opportunities for peace and stability in the Middle East. On the night I announced Operation Desert Storm, I expressed my hope that out of the horrors of war might come new momentum for peace. We have learned in the modern age geography cannot guarantee security and security does not come from military power alone. All of us know the depth of bitterness that has made the dispute between Israel and its neighbours so painful and intractable. Yet, in the conflict just concluded, Israel and many of the Arab states have for the first time found themselves confronting the same aggressor. By now, it should be plain to all parties that peacemaking in the Middle East requires compromise. At the same time, peace brings real benefits to everyone. We must do all that we can to close the gap between Israel and the Arab states – and between Israelis and Palestinians. The tactics of terror lead nowhere. There can be no substitute for diplomacy. A comprehensive peace must be grounded in United Nations Security Council Resolutions 242 and 338 and the principle of territory for peace. This principle must be elaborated to provide for Israel’s security and recognition, and at the same time for legitimate Palestinian political rights. Anything else would fail the twin tests of fairness and security. The time has come to put an end to Arab-Israeli conflict. The war with Iraq is over. The quest for solutions to the problem in Lebanon, in the Arab-Israeli dispute, and in the Gulf must go forward with new vigour and determination. And I guarantee you: no one will work harder for a stable peace in the region than we will. Fourth, we must foster economic development for the sake of peace and progress. The Persian Gulf and Middle East form a region rich in natural resources with a wealth of untapped human potential. Resources once squandered on military might must be redirected to more peaceful ends. We are already addressing the immediate economic consequences of Iraq’s aggression. Now the challenge is to reach higher – to foster economic freedom and prosperity for all people of the region. By meeting these four challenges, we can build a framework for peace. I’ve asked Secretary of State Baker to go to the Middle East to begin the process. He will go to listen, to probe, to offer suggestions, and to advance the search for peace and stability. I have also asked him to raise the plight of the hostages held in Lebanon. We have not forgotten them, and we will not forget them. To all the challenges that confront this region of the world, there is no single solution, no solely American answer. But we can make a difference. America will work tirelessly as a catalyst for positive change. But we cannot lead a new world abroad if, at home, it’s politics as usual on American defense and diplomacy. It’s time to turn away from the temptation to protect unneeded weapons systems and obsolete bases. It’s time to put an end to micro-management of foreign and security assistance programs, micro-management that humiliates our friends and allies and hamstrings our diplomacy. It’s time to rise above the parochial and the pork barrel, to do what is necessary, what’s right and what will enable this nation to play the leadership role required of us. The consequences of the conflict in the Gulf reach far beyond the confines of the Middle East. Twice before in this century, an entire world was convulsed by war. Twice this century, out of the horrors of war hope emerged for enduring peace. Twice before, those hopes proved to be a distant dream, beyond the grasp of man. Until now, the world we’ve known has been a world divided – a world of barbed wire and concrete block, conflict and cold war. Now, we can see a new world coming into view. A world in which there is the very real prospect of a new world order. In the words of Winston Churchill, a "world order" in which "the principles of justice and fair play ... protect the weak against the strong ..." A world where the United Nations, freed from cold war stalemate, is poised to fulfil the historic vision of its founders. A world in which freedom and respect for human rights find a home among all nations. The Gulf war put this new world to its first test, and, my fellow Americans, we passed that test. For the sake of our principles, for the sake of the Kuwaiti people, we stood our ground. Because the world would not look the other way, Ambassador [Saud Nasir] al-Sabah, to-night, Kuwait is free. Tonight as our troops begin to come home, let us recognise that the hard work of freedom still calls us forward. We’ve learned the hard lessons of history. The victory over Iraq was not waged as "a war to end all wars." Even the new world order cannot guarantee an era of perpetual peace. But enduring peace must be our mission ... |
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