Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Flying High

BuzzFlash Calls Them Turncoats
It seems the big telecom boys have come up with a way to turn bloggers against their best interests. How? By offering them big bucks to run a certain misleading ad about "Internet neutrality," the phrase of the hour for bloggers. Bloggers, like me, are pretty dumb, certainly egotistic and therefore selfish as hell, too. See, the big telecoms have realized this. Bloggers are ordinary boys and girls, kids in the sense of having found a hole in the fence of a before-privileged and well-protected environment. BuzzFlash, for instance. They have become one of the top "progressive" providers of political news and comments on the Internet. But who are these people? Like Dr. Theresa Whitehead? You ever heard'a her? BuzzFlash, as far as I know, is a classroom of sixth graders up in a Chicago suburb. BuzzFlashers, from what I gather from their editorials, are pretty good newswriters. They have a "common" style, though all of their eyebrows are upturned with every corporate or political shennanigan they are questioning, as though all of this shit surprises the hell out of them. That tells me these are fairly young people. None of these dangerous days surprises any hell out of anyone old enough to remember that every president since McKinley ( a puppet of a man named Mark Hanna) was assassinated has had some kind of scandal or trumped-up war involvement or some kind of little intervention going on against some country somewhere, or some kind of economic f-ing up and going into fearsome debt--a la the Hoobert Heever administration (I lifted this mispronounciation from an old Bloopers album a guy named Kermit used to put out. There were about 8 volumes of these Bloopers albums, and on the very first one, a radio announcer was intro-ing president Hoover and it turned out, "My fellow Amuricans, the president of the United Snakes, Hoobert Heever." That's the rich bastard's name for me from then on)*, or the previous totally corrupt administration of Warren G. Harding. I mean come on, Harry Truman's dropping the A-bombs on Japan was pretty controversial. Harry then turned around and said the US Army should be integrated. Holy bejesus, Strom Thurmond almost had to interrupt an affair with one of his black paramours when Harry started talking "integration."

*[the first Daily Growler footnote] This is the same Bloopers album that contained the Uncle Don episode; you know the one where the board operator left the microphone on after the show tag and you heard Uncle Don say, "So sooo long kids from your Uncle Don, see ya next time"...then you hear Don coming off the set and he says, "That ought'a hold the little bastards..." It was a wonderful moment in radio since any grown person doing a kiddie show has to eventually feel that way. I mean Uncle Don didn't want that damn kiddie show to be his height of fame! On an early Sonny Rollins album, his Live at the Vanguard -- on Blue Note from 1957, "A Night in Tunisia," I think it is, with Donald Baily on bass and Pete La Roca on drums, Sonny comes out and says, "Hi, I'm Sonny Rollins..." then out of nowhere, he says, "Who did you expect, Uncle Don?" I love it. Sonny referring to a Bloopers album. Sonny, by the way, born in Harlem, started as a piano player; I always remember that when I hear Sonny playing the tenor.

Eisenhower's administration was fraught with scandals, secret war plans, the McCarthy hearings, the Dulleses, the unraveling of a wrong war in Viet Nam, search and destroy missions, secret assassinations, the assassination of South Vietnamese leaders. I mean how scarrier than Joe McCarthy are today's politicians? They're still the same dudes. The same Nixons, Rayguns...a big huge Ship of Fools since Day One over in Independence Hall in Philly on that stiffling July afternoon when pooped old overweight Ben Franklin told John Hancock, "Take the damn quill, Hancock, you snob, and sign that damn piece of shit Red Tom wrote up there...mine was ten god-damn times better, but hell, it's too hot to argue today and besides, the fucking British are coming, so let's get on with it. As long as you keep the darkies one-quarter citizens and don't let any women vote, it's fine with me."

Only very young people could be surprised at political or corporate shennanigans. Do young reporters know anything about Ludlow, Colorado, in 1914, when the Colorado National Guard, We the People's militia, fired on and killed 25 striking miners, mostly immigrants, striking against cold, stonehearted mine owners, even back then able to get away with ordering miners to work in sometimes sure-death conditions miles under the Sangre de Cristos Mountains in this instance. Unions are hated in this country to this day--listen to the Wolf--because unions were originally started by immigrant laborers, foreigners--included the Irish, the Chinese, the Italians, the Germans, the Swedes, the Norwegians, the Polish, the Mexicans, blacks, Naive Americans--these scurvy lathered scumbag immigrant laborers were the origins of the labor movement in this country. Check out the Haymarket Massacre...same thing, the leaders of the progressive and peaceful unionist movement were meeting to hear speeches from its mostly German immigrant makeup, except for Albert and Lucy Parsons who were from Texas. I don't think these young blog newshounds know about such things, or if they do, they don't realize this is the same thing going on now that has been going on since Teddy Roosevelt was driven out of the Republican Party for being too fair-minded in terms of the majority of Americans who are working people, laborers, striving for the American Dream, which is a chance to earn enough money to buy the house, the car, the dog, get the wife, the husband, have the kids, the little geniuses, then see that the kids get the best education possible so they can exceed the parents, move on up, see things from the top of the world and not at ground level. You see, I believe, since we are monkeys essentially, being on the ground leaves us vulnerable--so we strive to get to the top of the trees, way up there where there's safety as well as the best fruit and the best views. So, all the average working stiff wanted, whether it was my self-employed failed mirror-making father or my "successful" dietician mother or your whatever stiff working parents did for you, was a fair chance to strive for that stupid American Dream that was built on the promises of God through the Protestant Ethic for most American monkeys, which are the white strivers. At the same time, blacks were looking for the same chance, the same chance they'd already been given by good ole manic depressive Honest Abe Lincoln (who we now know wanted to send all blacks to Liberia--he was for paying their way) and his Emancipation Proclamation, June 'teenth, which, of course, fell on phony-deaf ears throughout the white nation. The majority of whites all over the US are still scared to death of blacks, that I'll guarantee you. Nothing like driving up with a black girlfriend to introduce her to your "liberal" white parents, or maybe insinuate that you are intending on sleeping in the same bed with her while you're visiting...blah, blah, blah. You catch my drift? See how gentle I'm being? I'm guiding the young, who are kinda blind and stumble-bummish and don't know, but they are bright and should open themselves up to being led by those of us who have already tread where fools feared to go and we know what is possible if you put peaceful negotiable thoughts ahead of Capitalist war thoughts, a system that keeps each of us at war with each other, the world of competition they expect us to participate in wholeheartedly with all the others of us and on very, very unlevel and certainly unfair grounds. Money is negotiable; why not peace?

Under the Bushes and the New World Order, we are all supposed to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps--and if we have no boots, well then, hey, according to the Bushes you're fucked unless you can steal a good pair and get away with it, then you're welcomed back into the fold of their straight and narrow characterization of "the good life." Of course, it's quite obvious, Georgie Porgie, our "president" was born with a pair of silver boots already on his dainty little girlish feet --so pull up those bootstraps, buckaroos, and let's slosh through the Katrina of shit together, hand in hand, arm in arm...WHOA, get your hand outta my pocket, you sorry....

Let me jump the track a moment: Bobby Jr Kennedy claims he's going to bring a suit against the state of Ohio charging the results of the 2004 presidential election in Ohio was a sham and that fraud was involved. Bobby gained large-eyed blogosphere huzzahs for his Rolling Stone article where he proves through exit polls versus vote count that there were shennanigans going on...and I, thegrowlingwolf got kinda pissed and said, "Oh, gee-whiz, Bobby, it took you this long to figure that out; where were you the night of the election and everybody I know who hangs with me immediately said, "Oh shit, Ken Blackwell has controlled the votes...the bastard is giving them all to Bush...and, Wow,look, one county in Ohio with 110,000 registered voters actually gave over 200,000 votes to Bush. And the president of Diebold the voting machine company said he was gonna get Bush that election. Holy Cow, Bobby, where were you then. The same place, I'm sure, John "the Coward" Kerry was by 11:30 that night Bush stole the Ohio vote, safely tucked into your bed in your cool rich-boy pad. So the blasphemous thegrowlingwolf openly says, "Hot air, Bobby? or are you really going to be the Kennedy to give back some of your money and fame to We the People who made you through supporting your old bootlegger grandfather...and I won't go into the rest of your family tree...but, let's face it, Bobby, boy, you're privileged, so I hope you use some of that unearned money for the good of mankind, and a Daily Growler Hera! Hera! of approval will be coming your way from our way. Remember, the only reason Georgie Good Little Porgie, Mommy's Boy, is "president" is because the Supreme Court appointed him president--the rest is bullshit. This "president" will carry an asterisk by his name in my history book, same as Henry Aaron and Barry Bonds carry asterisks in his history comic book. God, that's what I'm trying to get across. It's all BULLSHIT, I'm hollerin' to BuzzFlash--Molly Ivins, BartCop, Thom Hartmann, Al Franken--it's all total BULLSHIT, you guys. Shit is deaf. It's the foulest substance there is we manufacture--our bodies know what to do with shit--GET RID OF IT! And the way to get rid of bullshit is to shovel it off YOUR property and have it hauled away to a fertilizer processing plant and maybe they can make it into a useful fertilizer. I doubt that. There's so much acid in the New World Order's bullshit it's pretty much totally useless as fertilizer. Shit, we're stuck with carrying around this load of shit for the rest of humankind life.

By the bye, word is out that Bush is going to pardon Scott McClellan.

The Daily Kos. I haven't been on the Kos much, but it is getting all kinds of praise and glory hallelujahs over Air America. They even have the Daily Kos guy on as a commentator. I mean there are so many of these blogs. Whoever these guys are, a lot of them are naive and totally taken with themselves getting all this sudden expertise-paid-for attention, hanging out with guys who drive Rolls-Royces or stay in the best hotels when they're touring the states and have all of those HOLLYWOODY friends and they all have woodies on for Hollywood, if they could. These bloggers would have never thought it possible to gain so much fame when they were dipstick nerds back in their posh suburb high school days. [It's amazing to me how many people Al Franken went to high school with in Minneapolis who are now in politics or have political-commenting blogs or are NYC magazine columnists and get to be on Al Franken's Air America radio show all of the time. Hell, look at Al Franken! Why is he so privileged to be guiding intelligence in terms of politics and corporate visions in this country? He's, as far as I'm concerned, a failed comedian who became a comedy writer--I don't find him that funny, but then I don't find Garrison Keillor funny either and they're both from Minnesota, so, maybe there's a bias here with me toward Minnesotans. I've never been to Minneapolis, but a friend of mine who moved out there one winter told me over the phone that his shoes had frozen to the sidewalk that day while he was waiting on a bus. He said it was strange. You suddenly try to move and you can't. YOUR SHOES ARE FROZEN TO THE SIDEWALK. Now that's funny. Minnesota drove John Berryman--pass that bottle to me--to jump off the Mississippi River bridge there, I might as well add.

Dream Song 112: My framework is broken, I am coming to an end

My framework is broken, I am coming to an end,
God send it soon. When I had most to say
my tongue clung to the roof
I mean of my mouth. It is my Lady's birthday
which must be honoured, and has been. God send
it soon.

I now must speak to my disciples, west
and east. I say to you, Do not delay
I say, expectation is vain.
I say again, It is my Lady's birthday
which must be honoured. Bring her to the test
at once.

I say again, It is my Lady's birthday
which must be honoured, for her high black hair
but not for that alone:
for every word she utters everywhere
shows her good soul, as true as a healed bone,—
being part of what I meant to say.

John Berryman

from http://www.poethunter.com/

An amazing site, by the bye. You can get a whole e-book of John Berryman's poems free on this site. Hot damn! Worth howlin' over.]

Anyway, BuzzFlash is saying several of these blogs, the Daily Kos included, are taking ads, they're getting up to $1400 an ad for, that are misleading about what is happening in Congress over the neutrality of the Internet, which means it is a free highway of information as it is right now. BuzzFlash claims these ads are misleading and paid for by the telecom companies who want to privatize the Internet and turn it into a toll highway of information, going on the all-Amurican grounds that "thar ain't nuthin' free in this here land of the free."

Hell yes the Daily Kos will take an ad making that kind of money off a blog. Who cares if the ad is antiblog; take their f-money and run. By running the ad doesn't necessarily prove they approve of the ad. I see a lot of teevee stations that run disclaimers as to the honesty and integrity of the following INFOMERCIAL--and what a evolutionary phenomenon the Infomercial was! Turn an ad for a second-rate, shoddy, stupid Ron Popiel-type product into a teevee show. Stupid Amuricans don't realize they are watching one long thirty minute commercial. I like David Orrick's vacuum cleaner infomercials 'cause he uses that very hot, to me, Terri Quillette as his babe show hostess. And, boy, how rich is David Orrick? His infomercials and commercials run on radio and teevee every other slot it seems like all day and night long.

Being a hypocrite is being an Amurican, mah friends.

You will have noticed I'm not as lycophantic as I was when I first started riding shotgun on this blog. I'm still in need of wolfbane and necklaces of garlic, but I'm keeping my maniacal ululations inside me, in my narrative well. I may be just f-ing tired of writing day after day about another blunder by George that has caused more death and total destruction in countries that really never did anything to us; in country's where foreign invaders are a natural part of their history...holy shit, you see what I mean? I'm tired of alerting (like my wolf ears pricking up) that the pantywaisted fops in the Dumbocratic Party won't go for any throats like a cagey wolf and are sitting back on their privileged heels (Howard Dean's a former governor and a former doctor--don't you know he's richer than sin?) and waiting for the elections in November. Such a jolly bunch of losers. And the Dumboasses will lose in November...and then what will we bloggers be writing? Nothing, because by then the blogs will be on the Telecoms's "dirt road" so far behind the rest of the E-world, it will be like SPITTING IN THE WIND--meaning, it's all gonna come back in our faces full blast. But take their ads, then spend their money putting your own ads up and telling bloggers the truth about why you took their phony ads. All ads are lies anyway; so it doesn't really matter. Hell, take one of those Exxon-Mobil ads that show driving your SUV and creating more carbon monoxide is LIFE itself. Charge 'em out the ass. And use the money to put and ad of yours back against them. LIFE has the word "lie" in it.

We bloggers are just too damn young, selfish, stupid, and greedy the same as the enemy because we're all having to make livings in a Capitalist dog-eat-dog society, so we're dogs same as Unka Dick, Rummy, good ole sweetheart Condo-leaser Rice, hell, Slick Willie, Al "Natural-born loser" Gore, Jimmy Carter, it doesn't matter, they go where the buck takes them--we're just pissing on the other side of the street from those characters, that's all; we are just trying to get across that it's the same shit but it's the same shit on the sunny side of the street, the hopeful side of the street.

So take their stupid ads. As long as you know everything put out by corporations and the government ARE LIES, LIES, LIES. Everything George Junior says is a lie. Everything Unka Dick says is a lie. Everything Unka Dick's lesbian daughter says is a lie. Everything Karl Rove says is a lie. Everything Condo-leasing Rice says is a lie. Everything Colon "Taking It in the Ass" Powell said was a lie. Everything Al Gore said on the night he conceded to Bush without a fight was a lie. Everything John "the Coward" Kerry said on the night he conceded his election to Georgie Porgie was a lie. Both of the loser jerks in bed by 11:30 that night in their F-ing mansions in Tennessee and Massachusetts (or the one in Pittsburgh, too, in the case John "the Coward" Kerry). Al "the Loser" Gore has gone on to worry about global warming--"Hey, Al, sell all your stocks and bonds, man; sell all your limosenes and SUVs and quit burning gas in your mansions's heating systems. Everything is a fucking lie when it comes from the mouth of a politician, a corporate CEO, a spin doctor, a public relations firm spokesman, a spokesperson for the pharmaceutical oligarchy, old Great White Father Pappy Bush, old Slick Willie Clinton, Mother Hillary Rodham Clinton, the Honorable Clarence Thomas...you see where I'm blogging to? And don't trust these military jerks who are turning progressive suddenly, like John Murtha. Remember my warning about Viet Nam vets: they're all crazy as hell and you would be, too, if you'd'a gone through the hell they went through--and as Freud would say, they all need to talk about it, dammit; get hypnotized and let it out. On the couch, Murtha, and get it out of your system. Yes, Murtha can help in terms of dealing with military types, but please, he's not presidential--Bush and his Asshole Creepy Baby Gang will eat Murtha raw and spit his ass out all over John McCain, John Kerry, Colon "They're Up My Ass" Powell, Max Cleland, Paul Hackett, General Wesley Clark...military dudes are scared to death of superiors. That's a fact, son. So, no military dudes for president. They're all nuts.

for The Daily Growler

The Daily Growler Quote of the Day
"It is not difficult to be alone if you are poor and a failure. An artist is always alone--if he is an artist. No, what the artist needs is loneliness." Henry Miller, Tropic of Cancer.

A Daily Growler Sports Bulletin With Marv Backbiter

Hell, I've had my head in a bucket of ice water for the past few sweltering days in the hellhole of our nation's capital. The District of Corruption has to be the hottest hellhole on earth, especially when Congress is in town. I see where our "president" is off on another fly away, this time to Europe. I guess we pay dearly for all of those flights, but what the hell, he's the boss, don't forget; he's the decider and he's decided all the time.

I decided to finally start watching foreign football again. I watched Togo get their asses kicked and their witch doctor was in the crowd this time and their Dutchman-looking coach was back on the bench but it didn't do them any good at all. They lost. They're gone. Adios, Togo.

Watching the Brits right now trying to beat Sweden, who I have no idea how good they are. England doesn't look that threatening though they certainly have the fan power; jesus, this stadium is ringing heartily with "God Save the Broad That Looks Like a King" throughout its rafters. Now let me stop here and say, I've seen some home movies of Queen Liz when she was a budding teenager and, hey fellows, look the other way if you're holy and afraid of talking plain the British monarchs and their many offspring and morganatic bastard hangers on (some of them descendants of original Nazis, by the bye)--but little Elizabeth was a healthy girl, well-endowed chestwise and rearwise, and frisky as a young pup around young men--I site the movie where she running like an antelope fawn around a bunch of horny Royal Brit navy dudes. Anyway, back to my reason for being: England--WHOAAAA, Nelly, Sweden just scored a GOOOOOOOOOL. Hot damn. I love seeing the Brits go down. It's the American in me I guess. Like one of my old pals who was a gyrene in the pits of WWII hell--Google "the lost batallion and read about it--who told me it made him shuddered a bit to look around him and see all the fun things in his living room, his teevee, his stereo were made in Japan; hell, his Mercedes out in the driveway was made in Germany. "Is this what I went through that fucking hell for?" and he would be pissed; just like thegrowlingwolf's friend, the Pool Player, a trained "gook" killer couldn't go in anyplace and stay where an Asian-American was or an Asian tourist, anybody who looked to him like a "gook"--what army guys were taught to call that enemy by their army superiors--those guys army guys all have to call "Sir" and salute--just like a slave had to be respectful to the superiors on the old plantation.

I'm that way with Brits. I frequent an Irish bar in my neighborhood. I can tolerate the bloody Irish, but when the Brits hit the bar and start their loud boasting and pretending, I have to exit out the side door before I gets me Amurican dander up. So good, the Swedes have tied the might Beckham-led Brits. I kicked 'em off my potential finalist list several posts back.

Here's the way I stack up now:

1) Brasil, Argentina, Spain, and the Netherlands
2) Ecuador--Well, the party's over for Ecuador--Germany whacked 'em good.
3) Germany, Portugal, that ilk
4) Sweden, if they beat England today and they may do it; they outplaying England in the 2nd period as I type this. Wow, I can't believe Sweden tied England. When I turned it off England was ahead 2-zip, 27 minutes into the flay. Sweden came back, so shit, they both move on. What friggin' luck.

Way down around "Hasn't got a chance in hell" is the USA. Why is the USA such a shitty team? Last year in the Gold Cup they played pretty damn good. So whaaa happened? I'm embarrassed. I noticed the "president" never comments much about sports; he hasn't said a word about the World Cup. Idiot.

Baseball: I was looking over both leagues and was happy to see that the Mets are still the best percentage team in baseball despite losing to Baltimore recently. The Yankees? Hokey Smoke, they are a mess. A bunch of high-flying birds most of them with injured wings. And what a sucky bunch of pitchers. Look for another foolish move by Steinbrenner, like talking Roger Dodger back into baseball. It's bad enough a Yankee fan has to endure aging once-amazing Randy "No Longer Randy" Johnson.

Looks like the Cards, Oakland, ChiSox--shit, the Mets are like 9 games ahead of Bobby Cox and his Braves (Wahoo-type Braves, mind you). Tom Glavine for the Mets may be having his last spurt of success afore he's ready for the backdoor. He's one of the top pitchers in baseball, thanks to pitching for the Mets and having to take the glory away from constant-glory-getting but not-coming-through old Pedro Martinez, at one time the best pitcher in baseball? Was he? Not any more. Like Randy Johnson, he still has his moments, but it ain't like it used to be, mi hombre viejo.

I'm still predictin' a Subway World Series--and what a great series that would be what with both teams playing Yankee-style baseball--and one bringing Billy Ball to the National League and making it work. Best hitting pitchers ever in baseball? Warren Spahn could hit good. Who else? Bob Lemon, the Cleveland Indian (the Wahoo-type again) ace, was a good hitter. And, of course, Babe Ruth.

I'm cutting out; going out for some ham. Bah, humbug on England winning...shit, or merde, anything French driving the Brits nuts.

for The Daily Growler

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