The Daily Growler Presidential Candy-dates RANKings

They're All Pretty Rank
We listened this morning (Wednesday, Jan. 16) to Amy Goodman's Democracy Now during which she played excerpts from the staged MSNBC-General Electric Nevada Primary Dumbocrat debate (GE, by the way, owns Raytheon, a big military industrial contractor--thick as hops in Iraq--making billions off We the People--while we lose they gain--ain't that IRONY at its meanest and best!! GE is also in the nuclear power plant-building business, too). This staged debate was between the three top Dumbocrats, Hillary, Barrak, and Johnny Boy--BUT, the hippest of them all, the butt of all the others's jokes (he's a little shrimp married to a big giant redhead), Dennis Kucinich, was determined by the campaign-contributing networks to be unworthy of running for president and even though he is running for president these media-crooks refuse to recognize his running, refuse to let him debate, as though it was THEIR privilege to decide who could participate in presidential candidate debates (remember, the League of Women Voters used to handle these debates, but the Neo-Cons decided the League of Women Voters was a terrorist organization--I think the "abuse" of the LofWV started in Jeb Bush's Florida back before that 2000 debacle where the Supreme Court (a court of legal hacks and big-lipped asskissing toadies) decided who we needed as president and look what they gave us) or for that matter who could run for president in the first place and then it's their privilege to decide who should get the nomination, the VOTERS having no say in any of it, only in participating in the clown-like voting process now that seems to be controlled by big corporate enterprises devoted to making big profits off the vote by forcing their electronic voting machines on us that come w/0 paper trails and that are totally controlled by the PRIVATE corporations who manufacture these worthless pieces of crap tools of deceit--Diebold was so crooked and its machines so faulty and foul-up-able they had to change their name--they ain't Diebold no more.

Do we think we have one-person-one-vote in this country? HAH. The way we vote in this country is totally stupid--set up by early white aristocrats (the Great White Fathers) to be the privilege of white male landowners--the same bunch of old stinking white men that used to make up the juries--and were the judges, too. We've always been ruled by aristocrats, elitists, fops, and spoiled rich-brat fools, like Teddy Roosevelt--yeah even that tough-guy icon was a fop fool, a morganatic-bastard weakling of a man who once he got power killed himself proving what a bully of a man he was--"speak softly and carry a big stick" (he meant "big prick" 'cept he, like his future nephew FDR, didn't have a big prick--or as some said, he was a big prick of the self-centered kind). Anyway, we've always been ruled by these aristocrats--and now throw in all these nouveau riche ones like Bill and Hill and Johnny Boy Edwards and the Mittster and Rudolph Mussolini and all their campaign contributors--rich, rich, rich, rolling in the loot, all stolen legally by these greedy and power-hungry and wishing to dominate us professional politicians--remember, there wasn't a bar Teddy Kennedy could pass, especially the BAR exam--yes, precious fakirs desire to DOMINATE us--talking down their stupid noses at us like we're 6th graders--have you noticed that? Bush talks down his fucking stupid nose at We the People, too, like we're too god-damn dumb and ninnified to challenge his bad boy know-it-all spoiled-special-privileged-rich-boy stance--his defiant-of-reality stance--living like he does in his little spoiled rich brat fantasy world. All of these sleazy characters are living in a Beltway fantasy world, a world that separates them high and mighty from real people, the people who have to wake up at early hours of the morning to make the draggy drive or commuter ride into some filthy city where they rush to their jobs and when they get to these jobs, they have to work their asses off, more and more work, less and less incentives, less and less benefits, smaller and smaller raises, no bonuses, no overtime, longer and longer required work hours, and no job security whatsoever--and yet all these presidential candidates haven't lived in that world in so long--I mean, come on, Billy Jeff Clinton was born in a white trash trailer house with no wheels in Hope, Arkansas (the "Welcome to Hope, Arkansas" signs as you were entering Hope from every direction back in the early fifties, Slick Willie was a kid there, showed the top half of a young black man's head, his matty hair standing up Buckwheat style, his big wide white eyes glowing with glee, his big broad nose flared, his big flappy lips flared, his shiny, shiny white choppers readying to chomp down on the heart of a big red slice of watermelon--you see, in that loamy land around Hope they raised watermelons--and y'all know how those little woolie-bullies ("pickaninnies" as Billy Jeff's mama would have called them) loved some watermelon--but then all us white folks know that about black people)---one of those little watermelon-eatin' boys could have been Billy Jeff's rumored black baby); Hill never did live in that world; Obama hasn't really ever lived in an American slum or ghetto--he's not really an American black; and Johnny Boy Edwards--he's used to being rich--says he pulled himself up by his bootstraps but we doubt that; and we know the Mittster was born rich; and we suppose VietNam Nut-job John McCain is a rich man, too (what an idiot VietNam Vet Cap'n Mc Cain is--he said in Michigan he was going to bring the auto industry back to Detroit--that's like Ronnie Raygun saying we'd one day being able to fly to Tokyo in 3 and a half hours); and Rudolph Hitleroni is beaucoup rich, mostly from dipping his grubby hands into the various 9/11 funds he raised to help the families of the victims survive, though those victims swear they saw very little of those billions of dollars Rudi claimed he raised, and also for running a second-rate security outfit--Bernie Keric was one of Rudi's security experts--hey, knock old Bernie if you must, but Judith Regan the celebrity book publishing millionaire babe said Bernie, though a scumbag, was the best damn dick she'd ever had ploughed into her, so that's saying a manly something for the dude; or Mike "The Baptist Huckster" Huckabee--sure he's gotta be a millionaire (another dipstick from the great progressively backward hillbilly state of Arkansas. Why are we so charmed by Arkansas politicians, by Old South politicians?--what charm do these chisling backwoods hicks have on us? Minister Mike wants to put "God's ways" in our Constitution--wow, what a total nutjob--the Constitution separates church and state, Mikey boy, but then, that Mikey, he'll believe anything--preachers, by the way, are experts at lying--look what they believe in)-- and on and on it goes, the Plutocrats are our slavemasters.

Anyway, Amy Goodman played excerpts from the MSNBC-GE Nevada debate this morning on her show--the debate that Dennis Kucinich wasn't allowed to participate in--and she did it in such a way that she had Dennis Kucinich in Washington, District of Corruption, on air with her and after she played an excerpt from the debate she gave Dennis Kucinich the same questions and allowed him the same amount of time, 90 seconds, to make his replies.

All of the "accepted" candidates, Barack, Hillary, and Johnny Boy, gave totally absurd answers to the absurd questions asked the politically correct candidates by NBC Nightly News anchor weirdo-slant-headed-looking Bozo Williams who was the moderator of the debate who posed some very absurd questions to the absurdly confused politicians followed by some sideline questions from that other sterling idiot of a millionaire teevee pundit, "TIMMY!" Russert (anybody watch South Park?). The parrot-mimicking candidates gave their "standard" propped up spiels, all of them so experienced, all of them so more intelligent that We the People (ooooooh Obama has a law degree from Harvard)(oooooh, Hillary has a Yale law degree--oooooh--when did Yale first admit blacks? when did Harvard first admit blacks?--bet it wasn't that long ago!)(ooooooh, we don't really know where Johnny Boy Edwards got his law degree--at Gamecock U., the South Carolina state university?)--oh, jeez, we get sick of railing on these birds--fuck 'em all, we say.

Let's Rank on the Candidates
Johnny Boy Edwards--Dennis Kucinich says if you check Johnny Boy's background deep enough, you find he's got his balls in the steady grip of the Fortress Co.--they've got control of his balls--Fortress being a hedge fund company--big sub-prime mortgage buyeruppers--and one of the company's Fortress has under its phony feathered wings is Humana, yep, the big HMO in Louisville--started I think by good ole Texas Cracker Criminal first-class Tom DeLay's moneybags daddy--making profit off human illnesses; making big profits off human terminal illnesses; wow, can you imagine the logic that says unless a hospital is profitable, you shut it down, no matter it's success as a working hospital? So Johnny Boy Edwards, even though he's hollering he's for national healthcare and putting a cap on these sub-prime mortage assholes and regulating banks and Wall Street and hedge funds, he's lyin' like a dog--I mean, come on, Johnny Boy Edwards once had a 500-grand-a-year job with Fortress. He said he took the job to learn about poverty. How to make poverty; how to put people into poverty. Funny thing is, though Johnny Boy admits he worked for Fortress, he won't say anything about what his job was there and what he did there. Lying bastards, all of 'em.

Obama and Hillary Mama
We're sorry to report that we've determined none of the current presidential candidates, Repugs or Dumbocrats, deserve your vote. After listening to that Nevada debate this morning and hearing Dennis Kucinich's response to that debate he was forbidden to participate in--has cleared up our minds on a lot of points--Kucinich forbidden to debate with the "frontrunners" even though with Bill "Nuclear Bill" Richardson out of the race, Dennis is now fourth in the polls with the Dumbos--but MSNBC said, "Nope, we control these debates and we don't want your antiwar, proterrorist message going out over our "News First" airwaves--"What'd'ya mean You the People own the airwaves? We laugh our asses off at you folks believing that shit"--but we are sorry to say both Obama and Hillary were just as babbling, moronic, double-speaking fools in their replies to the prepped questions as Johnny Boy Edwards was. They were both spouting two-faced resolutions that they were going to end the war in Iraq--Obama in a year; Hillary doesn't really know how long it will take her but then she up and says, hell, I'll say I'll end the war in a year, too--but, whoaa, Nelly, Hill wants at least to protect our Embassy in Iraq so she'll have to leave some gyrenes there--we're an occupying nation, Hill, what Embassy are we allowed to have there?--that billion-dollar green zone pink elephant?--that Embassy? so she'd leave enough brave soldiers there to guard that precious worthless piece of wasted-money Embassy...blah, blah, blah--we'd rather have listened to a turkey gobbling for an hour than anything the Dumbos said in that Nevada debate. Of course they're all against the War in Iraq now but only Dennis Kucinich of all these Dumbocrats voted against the War in Iraq back when Hillary and Johnny Boy were saying "yes" to every fucking thing phony president Bush wanted, that War based on lies, billions upon billions of constantly flowing-into-Iraq big bucks--3 billion a month that war is costing us--and Dennis Kucinich voted against every war funding bill over these past long illegal War in Iraq years, too--oh well, Dennis can't be president; MSNBC-General Electric won't allow him to run. Even if he got elected president, MSNBC-General Electric wouldn't allow him to take office.

The Mittster and Cap'n McCain in Michigan
Wow, what a jokey primary the Michigan Militia primary was. Cap'n McCain said he was going to restore the auto industry in Detroit, make it rise up to its old superior place among carmakers--"I'm gonna bring jobs to Michigan...." Babble, babble, babble. We say put John back in a tiger cage until the election is over.

The Mittster--hey, he boasted about his old Daddy George "American Motors" Romney--another richer than Jesus son of a bitch who was as dumbass a Repugnican as he was a dumbass carmaker. Who do Mormons pray to, Jesus or Moroni? He's rich, folks, so that makes him a viable candidate.

Boy are We the People in trouble. Looks like war, war, and more war, no matter which one of these goons get into the WHITE House--they have a gleam in their eye when they talk about war.

We give up. Don't vote this year. Let's ring Chaos in with a state of total anarchy. Uh-oh. We just said a very dirty word--we are washing our mouth out with soap.

thestaff
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