[Ralph Waldo Emerson on Conservatism at End of This Post]
Krusty the Clown for President
I once saw one of the artists on the Fox animated success story The Simpsons showing how he drew Bart Simpson--a tin can with a handle for an ear, etc.--and then he mentioned that Krusty the Clown was made from the basic Homer character's head--the same basic head with the clown attributes added.
I like Krusty. He's the most real character of the show's cast of synthetic humans. He's the character I take seriously on that show.
I was laughing like a fakir hyena after watching the Unka Joe Biden and Sweet Sarah of Alaska "debate" last night (Thursday), with Gwen Awful moderating and asking the stupidest questions--hollowly asked questions followed by intentionally hollow answers--and after laughing my wolf-man ass off over the unbelievably stupid nonanswers these two unreal human beings were tossing about into the coldly abstract air, I suddenly thought, Jesus Christ, this is so inane and cardboard--why not Krusty the Clown for President?--you know, run him as a cartoon character--the animated Krusty running for President--he could keep Sweet Sarah of Alaska as his running mate; she fits Krusty as a sidekick to a tee! McCain's twice as nutjobbish as Krusty--whacky to the brain core, whereas Krusty still has a wickedly cynical mind, much trickier and mousetrappish than either Nutjob McCain's or Sarah Paleface's minds put together! Why not let cartoon characters run our government?
And the explanations today why a few days ago the House turned this same Wall Street bailout joke down and then just a few days later some of them suddenly do the old switcheroo (they used to call it flip-flopping--like fish out of water is where that comes from) and vote for an even worse version of the same bill--a bill with 150 billion dollars more giveaway in it due to the stupidest and most insulting boondoggles these viciously crooked numbskulls added to the bill--tax breaks for an arrow-making company; making millions of dollars available to NASCAR racetrack operators! And in spite of 75% of We the People being enraged by our being mugged by the very culprits who caused this whole mess to happen, it all still went through and passed and became "the law" and these smirking crooks are getting away with it, going Scot Free, avoiding jail, and then as if a big "Fuck You" yelled at We the People, being given the opportunity to manage this bailout money themselves--isn't that in itself amazin'? These Wall Street criminals pulled off the biggest robbery in world history--they held up the US government, that government which claims it's by the people for the people, that big pool of lily-livered pencil-necked geeks, and stole 700++++ billion bucks from We the People--and this wimp Congress stood before these goons shivering in their $500 designer shoes, shaking all over, shitting in their customed-tailored pants and wetting their Depends--Nancy "Rich Bitch" Pelosi caving in; Henry Reed, that joke, caving in; Obama caving in--under the influence of ex-Goldman-Sachs swindler Robert Ruben; McCain caving in from the beginning; the Black Caucus caving in; and Bush signing it today with one of his best smirks on his face. He trick-bagged our asses again just like he did after 9/11. No mention was made all week about the Invasion and Occupation of Iraq--a trick-bag war, an unnecessary war, a killing-field war, a war of ethnic cleansing, a war in Baghdad that has the USA putting walls around neighborhoods breaking up this city into ethnic zones, Sunnis, Shi'ites, Bath Party jokers (yes, they're back), the Kurds still causing troubles in the north--at war with each other now--millions still fleeing Iraq--millions of refugees from Iraq in Syria, Jordan, Palestine, places where they aren't wanted; yet, they stay in these places because they are too afraid to return to Iraq. And NO, no mention was made of this Wall Street bullshit being directly economically related to the start of this Iraq involvement and the price of a barrel of oil ($23 a barrel in March of 2003)--the Invasion and Occupation of Iraq is costing us 20 billion a month or something outrageous like that! We have a total of 300,000 troops in Iraq--150,000 regular US forces and another 150,000 contracted troops--troops of which the US Army refuses to even count their casualties--so we don't really know really how many contracted troops have been killed over there--4, 200 US armed forces deaths to date--and nobody is concerned about that figure anymore. In the meantime, both candidates are lying like dogs about "the surge" (more insurgency is really what that "surge" bullshit meant) working and how, Sweet Sarah of Alaska especially, they all believe we've won the "War" in Iraq and now it's time to move those tired, wearied, psychologically disturbed soldiers over into Afghanistan so our next president can get us involved in World War III by invading Pakistan--Bush, like Nixon was bombing Cambodia all the time he swore he wasn't (and Henry Kissingasser was there then, too, kneeling down with Nutjob Big-Crook Nixon and praying to Jesus--how sick is that?), is already trying to provoke a war with Pakistan--we will invade and try to occupy it--pricking at its borders now--killing civilians and not killing Taliban or Osama Bin Laden--killing civilians--what our Army does best--killing civilians or its own troops!
No mention of the Iraq "War" having anything to do with the Wall Street-trick-bag wrecked economy. I hear Obama and McCain talking about how they're going to create jobs and return the economy to its traditionally strong strength (doublespeak at its best) with their economics genius. This even though both these dudes were in Congress all this time this was going on and believe me, they both pocketed several thousand bucks of good ole boy Beltway K Street bribes and trips and homes and flying on those famous CEO private jets.
In the meantime, another clown, Donald Trump, opened a 300-million dollar tower looming up boringly dull over the skyline of Atlantic City today behind the Donald's max-tacky and several-time bankrupted Taj Mahal casino, which a lot of Atlantic Citians are hollering for the Big Donald to tear down it's such an eyesore. And the Donald says the reason the casinos in A.C. are sinking into the sands on which they're built is because there aren't enough hotel rooms there. Holy shit, I laughed, there are at least 5 huge casino-hotels going up all around Atlantic City--the Chelsea Hotel has a thousand rooms or so--some going for $2,000-a-night--and yet the Donald says what A.C. needs are more hotel rooms. Hotels. Hotels. Hotels. I have an 18-story hotel going up right smack-up-side my building--on a very narrow piece of property--and we already have two big hotels in my neighborhood and they are building up in the next block one 2,000-room, 72-story behemoth hotel and right over a block from that one on Sixth and West 32nd, they're building a 62-story hotel! Our economy is crashing around us due to that fucking Iraq mess we're involved in and here are these paper billionaires still building these tacky memorials to themselves all over New York City, all over Atlantic City--hotels, hotels, hotels, and then that horribly ugly Freedom Tower that will mile-high its ugly architecture 1776-feet over downtown Manhattan--plus 15 or 20 other towers--and, yes, these towers will be office towers and HOTELS! Hotels so expensive no ordinary person can afford to stay in them--hotel rooms in New York City average around $275-a-night, plus when you go to pay your tab, you find the city has added on a 14% hotel tax onto your bill--plus service charges by the hotel of things you have no idea what they're talking about. But, hey, it must be working, Fifth Avenue looks like a garbage dump most of the time with trash blowing around its sidewalks and gutters, huge bags of garbage piled out on the curbs, and double-decker bus after double-decker bus fouling up the already-fouled-up air by constantly going down Fifth in their tour circles--rain or shine--yes, tourists will actually don rain gear and ride on these double-decker bullshit buses even in pouring rains! To marvel at New York City? Every other building has scaffolding all over it--the Empire State Building had scaffolding all over it for about 7 years--my building has had scaffolding on it for nearly 20 years--I kid you not! So what do these people in these doubledecker buses ogle? What amazes them? I've lived here 39 years and I've never had a desire to go out to the Statue of Liberty. I have ridden the ferries to Staten Island, that's a fun trip unless the ferry captain is high on medication and rams his ferry dead into the pier and kills thirty or forty people, and I've been to Coney Island and some of the racetracks several times and I've been to both Yankees and Mets games, and I've seen all the museums at least once--though I haven't been to the Metropolitan Museum in 30 years--when I get in these museums they begin to bug me and I can't stand to see Picasso hanging among Vermeers or Valmincks and Braques--I want them all alone on their own walls--my walls--not with a bunch of dopey dopes walking around acting like they know how to view paintings in museums.
It's another day now--I'm writing 'Round Midnight! thedailygrowlerhousepianist sent me a disturbing email telling me jazz has been dead for 30 or 40 years! Holy shit, I thought, like Krusty the Clown, where the fuck has time gone?--and that time, what the hell did it really do to change anything?--in spite of passing time, things really stay the same! Today's automobiles really aren't that much different than the Detroit iron I drove as a kid and then a young man. You still drive them the same way. They still burn a lot of combustible fuels. They still cost an arm and a leg to maintain.
So Krusty the Clown and Sarah Palin for President and Co-President--I really would like to see Sweet Sarah of Alaska President!
I'm cynically thinking of admitting I'm going to vote for John "Nutjob" McCain and Sarah Paleface Palin (the Polar Bear Queen). I can't imagine what a tragic clown show that would be. Obama, same as usual, no fun at all--but think of John "Jowls" McCain and Sarah Paleface Palin and her brood in the White Man's House? To me, a writer and therefore a thinker, that's fodder for my novel cannons!
for The Daily Growler
From Ralph Waldo Emerson's Speech on Conservatism Given in Boston in 1845:
There is always a certain meanness in the argument of conservatism, joined with a certain superiority in its fact. It affirms because it holds. Its fingers clutch the fact, and it will not open its eyes to see a better fact. The castle, which conservatism is set to defend, is the actual state of things, good and bad. The project of innovation is the best possible state of things. Of course, conservatism always has the worst of the argument, is always apologizing, pleading a necessity, pleading that to change would be to deteriorate; it must saddle itself with the mountainous load of the violence and vice of society, must deny the possibility of good, deny ideas, and suspect and stone the prophet; whilst innovation is always in the right, triumphant, attacking, and sure of final success. Conservatism stands on man's confessed limitations; reform on his indisputable infinitude; conservatism on circumstance; liberalism on power; one goes to make an adroit member of the social frame; the other to postpone all things to the man himself; conservatism is debonnair and social; reform is individual and imperious. We are reformers in spring and summer; in autumn and winter, we stand by the old; reformers in the morning, conservers at night. Reform is affirmative, conservatism negative; conservatism goes for comfort, reform for truth. Conservatism is more candid to behold another's worth; reform more disposed to maintain and increase its own. Conservatism makes no poetry, breathes no prayer, has no invention; it is all memory. Reform has no gratitude, no prudence, no husbandry. It makes a great difference to your figure and to your thought, whether your foot is advancing or receding. Conservatism never puts the foot forward; in the hour when it does that, it is not establishment, but reform. Conservatism tends to universal seeming and treachery, believes in a negative fate; believes that men's temper governs them; that for me, it avails not to trust in principles; they will fail me; I must bend a little; it distrusts nature; it thinks there is a general law without a particular application, — law for all that does not include any one. Reform in its antagonism inclines to asinine resistance, to kick with hoofs; it runs to egotism and bloated self-conceit; it runs to a bodiless pretension, to unnatural refining and elevation, which ends in hypocrisy and sensual reaction.