Monday, February 12, 2007

If You'll Be My Dixie Chicken, I'll Be Your Tennessee Lamb

Music in America
I didn't watch the Grammies last night. I'm a musician, so awards shows look like jokes to me; I mean, aren't the winners known long before they hit the stage with their big staged production of guess who won?

The Dixie Chicks, for instance. OK, I found the Dixie Chicks interesting many years ago because they're Texas chicks who look pretty good, sing pretty good, and who play their instruments with a delightful flair, but their music actually never varies much from country chick harmonizing and the same old inventions in their instrumental stuff. So, what was it 6 years ago that their career had been put in a bucket by Clear Channel (a Texas rightwing company owned by a very loyal Bush supporter) and dropped into the well of nonexistence? All because the lead singer said Bush was a nutjob idiot who was getting our asses put in slings over the War on Terrerism. Ooooh, and they were considered so unpatriotic in those days. Hillary didn't defend them, did she?

So now the Chicks have gotten their revenge on the Little Spoiled Rich Boy "President" and have come away with 5 Grammies. Cheers to the recording industry for finally coming to their defense, too--the music industry went right along with the condemnation of them when it looked like they were Terrerist sympathizers. Just think, the CIA could have kidnapped the Chicks and shipped 'em off for a little terror over with our buddies the Syrians; or, can you imagine, the Chicks could'a been hauled off to Afghanistan and been imprisoned, raped, stacked up naked, and then had dogs sicked on 'em, and maybe they'd'a gotten a real patriot like Lynndie Englund (has she done porn yet? Oops, that's right, she's a mother now; sorry, Lynndie) to come up with something exotic-erotic to humiliate them.

And congratulations to Mary J. Blige. She's one I don't understand either. What's so great about her stuff? She's not an exceptional singer; no comparison whatsoever to Aretha Franklin though she does give Aretha a reason she's a singer, Aretha and Anita Baker. She doesn't really swing that much. Her songs or raps or whatever the hell her style is don't strike me as being that exciting, but then, who the hell am I? Mary J. is Pee Diddly's (Puff Daddy, Puffy, P Diddy--his real name's Sean) pride and joy, though Jeff Redd's the dude who gave her a CD contract, then --out'a heavy-duty Yonkers, though born in the Bronx. Tough life. Yonkers tough shit projects life--Yonkers a strange little city up the Hudson from the Big Apple--I think of it as an old Mafia town, mostly Italians and Irish, though my distant New York relatives were Dutch and they moved to Yonkers from Harlem back in the 19th Century. But still sorry, I just don't get this, I'm sure "cool" woman's glory.

I've often wondered why our music is separated into black and white categories. What if the Dixie Chicks got a black chick in their group? How would you then classify them? [I totally forgot the easily forgotten Spice Girls were a mixed group, though British.] As it is, there ain't many black folks singing Cuntry and Western out there--I mean who black since Charlie Pride dare say they dig Cuntry and Western music? Name a black Cuntry and Western band? Blacks are all categorized under their category and then there's the white categories. Blacks win in "Hip Hop"--white hip hop groups are on the decline since M & M's flame has flickered to a forgotten whiff of smoke and Kid Rock has managed to make a total fool out of himself--I mean when these white rockers start boffing all the white puff pastry chicks like Pam Anderson they lose their spunk--literally. I mean, when you start humping these nympho Playboy bunnies like Pam, you clean out your creative energies--you spend all your talent in your humping triumphs. Hemingway said everytime you spend your energy by screwing a woman while you're working on a novel you lose your creativity--it ejaculates itself out with your semenal ejaculations, dig?

Anyway, congrats to the Dixie Chicks and Mary J. Blige.

I've honestly never really heard the Dixie Chicks except on teevee. Were they ever on Austin City Limits? And, honestly again, I've never really heard a Mary J. Blige tune clear through.

No mention of our "president" being a fool during the Grammies, was there?

OK, I guess that party's over.

the The Daily Growler

By the Bye: Yes, I just read, another day of death and destruction in Baghdad. 80 died early this morning in a bombing incident. Damn, ain't ya glad you live in America?

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