Wednesday, September 01, 2010
Hey, All You Yahoos, the Occupation of Iraq Has Been Justified
Left (or Top): The good Capitalist lifestyle goes on in the Green Zone, the world's largest-ever embassy; Right (or Bottom): Those now-safe streets of freed Baghdad. Alas!
President Obama Fulfills His Campaign Promise of Pulling Our Combat Forces Out of Iraq While at the Same Time Justifying the War on Iraq by Declaring Operation Iraqi Freedom a Success
Ah, the sweet bullshit was flying wildly around the District of Corruption last night. President Obama (20% of Americans believe he's a Muslim and not a US citizen) was announcing an end to something in Iraq. He's bringing home our troops. Well, not exactly all of them. The approximate number "coming home" is rounded off to 50,000. The approximate number staying in Iraq is...whoaaaa...rounded off to 50,000! Oh, but wait a minute, those 50,000 are left behind to, let's see, work with Iraqi security forces (that's a joke isn't it?) to help them take back control of their country, Obama declaring that our original reason for being in Iraq was to help the Iraqis clean out the large number of terrorist cells and anti-American sentiment--"WHAT! Mr. President, no mention of Weapons of Mass Destruction or the real reason for this disastrous adventure in American colonialism designed and given to G.W. Bush to carry out by our Nazi-like Neo-Con enforcers, like Unka Dick, Dirty Donald Rumsfeld, Karl Hitler Rove, Paul Trotsky Wolfowitz, et. al."
But here was President Obama justifying this ruinous action by saying that there was definitely an al-Queda/insurgent/anti-Israel/wildly fundamentalist Islamic terrorist network busily active in Iraq and a threat to the freedom of Iraqis, a freedom denied them especially by the gasmaster (gas sold to him by the U.S. Government, the world's largest weapons-of-mass-destruction dealers), crazy (in that he defied the USA), modern-day Adolph Hitler, Saddam Hussein. Remember, that rat bastard? He's the son of a bitch who tried to murder little Georgie Porgie Bush's old pappy, George H.W. "Pappy" Bush, the great Commander in Chief (and former head of the CIA) who brought us our only "major" war victory since WWII--the truly patriotic and righteous Persian Gulf War--Operation Desert Sand--though in the end, Pappy chickened out of going on into Baghdad and occupying it in a matter of hours (his "Mission Accomplished" moment, a missing out of those humble and thankful Iraqis throwing rose petals at him) and going in and finishing off Sah-damn Hoo-sane (his son said "Hang the bastard high...without a trial...I won't that bastard DEAD, and if you boyz can't get the job done, I'll send his ass to the Texas Prison's death row and let the boyz in Huntsville put salt water in his veins")--but whoaaa, wait a minute, Saddam Hussein was a buddy of Pappy Bush's and old Donald Rumsfeld's back in those glory days of when we were backing Saddam in his war with _________ (guess who/fill in the blank)--Pappy Bush the man who came up with the Thousand Points of Light speech and justification for the Neo-Con New World Order, which his puppet son tried to carry out based on the 9/11 attack, which was a laughable event to Pappy Bush and his Saudi-Arabian adopted son, Prince Bandar Bush, as they sat in some private club in the District of Corruption watching 9/11 take place (Pappy was also reported to have been in Dallas for the Kennedy Assassination, another laughable moment in old Pappy's checkered life)--I think this is the moment Pappy realized he'd better have his son, Georgie Porgie, and the U.S. Air Force fly the rest of the Bin Ladens out of the country--which our vaunted Air Force managed to accomplish swiftly and efficiently, by the way--the same Air Force whose perimeter defense system failed We the People at the most crucial time it was needed--except most of our armed forces are so spread out all over the world (we are still the World's Policeman) we are left with a bunch of second-grade washed-out National Guardsmen to defend our borders--"Great job Air Defense System! A heck of a job," said G.W. Bush as he fled like the little coward bastard he is--flew off from reading My Pet Goat to a bunch of Florida 5th graders to the safety of our Strategic Air Command base in Omaha, Nebraska (the Strategic Air Command the brainchild of General Curtis "Bomb 'Em Back to the Stone Age" LeMay who designed SAC so he could keep bombers in the air 24/7--mastering the technique of refueling bombers in mid-air)--"Oooooh, I'm'a scared," Georgie Porgie squealed as he shivered in mortal fear inside that Omaha airbase. "I need a noseful of pure rock coke or at least a gallon jug of Jack Black to assuage my fears," the teeth-chattering scardy cat whined, "and where's my puppetmaster, Unka Dick? And where's my old Pappy? Where are you guys?" Unka Dick, that pathetic coward, was far underground in Virginia somewhere in his private bunker (how did that asshole know to have himself a private bunker?) and Pappy was laughing his ass off with Prince Bandar Bush over a fine hunter's breakfast watching 9/11 happen right on time. "I mean, son," Pappy Bush said to Prince Bandar that morning, "it's as though God, 'scuse me, Allah, gave us this miracle attack by some of your best men, Prince, good fine patriotic Saudi lads out to take a little revenge on my old wrinkled ass for attacking my old Bathist-Muslim pal, Sah-damn Hoosane, from Saudi sacred Islamic soil. You crazy towelheads. And you've got all that oil and all that oil money. I love you guys like you're part of my own family."
And so, the fine-upstanding-patroit, the man Obama declared wasn't such a bad guy after all--why, hell, after meeting G.W. and Pickles, our President confessed that he rather liked the dude. This same Georgie Porgie Bush who with quick-witted military aplomb decided to rain a little terror back on the people of Afghanistan. Why? How did we know so fast that 9/11 was planned and carried out by the Afghanistan people? These were Saudi-Arabians who attacked us (OK, one of 'em was a Jordanian) on 9/11, so how did we so fastly reveal not only who they were but photos of them--yes, they were Saudi-Arabians, but, REVELATION, they were actually members of Osama bin Ladin-Bush's al-Queda forces--those massive terrorist forces that were being allowed to amass in Taliban-controlled Afghanistan--WHY, these savage assholes were threatening to KILL Americans! Remember those grainy hard-to-hear-and-see video tapes Osama bin Ladin used to send regularly via way of our CIA?--I mean come on, this son of a bitch couldn't afford a digital video camera of professional quality?--of course the truth is Osama Bin Ladin had nothing to do with 9/11 and certainly for sure neither did the Afghanistan people.
Those 9/11 drunk-the-night-before Muslim military geniuses didn't fly into Boston from Afghanistan. They didn't fly into Boston from Pakistan. They didn't fly into Boston from Yemen. They didn't fly into Boston from Iran. They didn't fly into Boston from Iraq. They didn't fly into Boston from Turkey. As a matter of fact, where did they fly into Boston from? Was it Saudi-Arabia perhaps? Or Jordan? Or London? Or West Palm Beach, Florida?
And here, once again, let me praise the 20 or so Muslim fools who while in a hangover state, with only box cutters as weapons of mass destruction, drunken Muslim guys who didn't know how to fly huge airliners flew both those huge American airliners that aren't that easy to fly with such precision both planes miraculously hit the exact places in those two World Trade Center Capitalist Towers that brought them straight fucking down--slammed 'em down as though they'd been imploded. And look what death and destruction the poor Afghanistanis and Iraqis have had to endure for the sin of 9/11 and for the sin of their dictator trying to murder our faux-president's old shuffling Pappy. Our military admits that 65,000 Iraqis had their lives shot or bombed out from under them in our War for Freedom in Iraq--of course, the bleeding-heart Liberals, those humanitarian assholes, put dead civilian Iraqis more at 200,000, which to me is certainly closer to the truth than the figures given out by the Pentagon (check out their method of reporting Vietnamese casualties in that war we lost). Plus, on top of death and destruction, over 2 million Iraqis have been displaced from their properties and driven into exile in countries, some hostile to them, surrounding Iraq--plus, there are displaced Afghanistanis who fled for their lives from our freedom-bringing U.S.-NATO forces to the safety of Pakistan who are now ironically caught up in the devastating flooding of the Indus River that is still going on in the whole of Pakistan. Never mind the fact that way over 5,500 stupid young U.S. VOLUNTEER women and men have been killed in those two stupid wars. All to defend the 3,000 AMERICANS who were killed in 9/11! Has anyone ever checked how many of those 3,000 killed that day were US citizens?
Suddenly, out of nowhere, after invading and occupying Afghanistan and then saying he was no longer interested in Osama Bin Ladin, our greatest-ever election-stealing president, Little Georgie Porgie Bush, announced he was taking us to war with Iraq. Why? Why, it was a little invasion and occupation scheme that not only would get Georgie Porgie revenge for Saddam trying to murder his old Pappy but it would also be an easy takeover of the largest oil reserve left in the world, the original Neo-Con reason for that particular invasion and occupation. But Georgie Porgie had no solid reason to invade Iraq, so he invented one--Weapons of Mass Destruction--Saddam had 'em and Saddam had drone airships that could fly huge bombloads of massive destruction directly to the USA with intentions of dropping them on New York City--IT'S ALWAYS NEW YORK CITY! Norman Mailer asked the question in his book Advertisements for Myself why all Weapons of Mass Destruction were always aimed at New York City and not Washington, District of Corruption? Mailer was talking about those Soviet ICBMs (Intercontinental Ballistic Missiles--the Weapons of Mass Destruction of the 1950s and 60s) that Moscow had aimed at New York City. And it's still true today. Though Indianapolis, Indiana, got more Homeland Security money than New York City did, We the Citizens of New York City are still under the most scrutinizing surveillance system of cameras and sensory devices in the world (maybe we're even with London now--and our New York City billionaire mayor loves anything London in his effort to Europeanize New York City)--2,000 cameras in place now with several thousand more to come--also, the NYPD are discovering what seems like on a daily basis another Muslim plot to blow up something--like the terrorist bomber in Times Square whose bomb sputtered and ended up with only its M1 cherry bombs going off and causing a small fire in the rear of his SUV. All terrorists have access to SUVs. Our homegrown terrorist, Timothy "Ex-US Army Hero" McVeigh, following his American pride, used a U-Haul rental truck as his transportation. Has anyone ever read Gore Vidal's series of comments on Timothy McVeigh?
All of the above preamble is geared to be a mocking of President Obama's "Iraq Combat-ending" speech. He says we're turning a new page now in Iraq. Yes, we are keeping 50,000 troops there. Plus another 50,000 private contractors--like Blackwater, KBR, Halliburton of Dubai, Raytheon (these are the dudes who are currently pushing a ray gun they invented at the Pentagon--the one that shoots oven-high heats at a person's body, heat so painful that it causes that person to immediately on the spot admit they are terrorists), Dimecorp--plus, Hillary Clinton's little private army of 7,000 she needs to protect the world's largest-ever embassy and the U.S. citizens still hanging in Iraq machinating and politicizing and scheming for Iraq's oil and also the several thousand diplomatic corps staff Hillary needs to do her diplomacy shit as she fights to give all the rights of Iraq's oil to the big Global Market OIL companies like Shell, BP (yep, they've all but been forgiven for messing up our Gulf Coast), Chevron, Exxon-Mobil. And, too, we have 50,000-remaining combat troops to house and feed and supply with bullets and grenades and rockets to launch--"WHAAAAT!" you scream, "Obama has brought the combat troops home"--and I explain to you, "Yes, and 20% of you Yahoos believe President Obama is a Muslim and a non-US citizen, the same percentage of Americans who vote in our general elections. Some of these mopes believe not only is Obama a Muslim but he's also getting pretty close to being the Anti-Christ--I mean, he's trying to bring peace between Israel and the Palestinians this week much to the chagrin of the Fundy Christians and Racist Teabaggers who feel we have to defend Israel till the end of mankind's time because that's where their fabulous Jesus is returning to to set up his Jewish Kingdom (SURPRISE, Christian Yahoos, Jesus was a practicing Jew; he never was a Christian)--Jerusalem is the King of the Jews Joshua ben Joseph's royal city--though I argue, with the Mormons, that the New Jerusalem is actually Salt Lake City, Utah (and, hey, Jesus could easily walk on the waters of the Great Salt Lake).
My biggest guffaw moments in Obama's speech came when he over-and-over justified our invasion and occupation of Iraq based on the freedom-loving Iraqi's inability to overcome the combined evilness of Saddam-Hussein-Bathist Thugs-al-Queda-Insurgent terrorists and their ruthless control of Iraq--Iraq was a wasp-nest of Al-Queda and insurgent attacks--the insurgents of course were from Iran--We the American People have totally forgotten that Iraq and Iran were at war for a decade--and We the People of the USA backed Saddam Hussein in that war--could it be that this whole invasion and occupation was a scheme to get a foothold in Iraq in order to invade Iran? Who the hell knows, certainly not We the People of the USA. We'll never be able to separate the truth from all the lies that brought about these devastating invasions and occupations--wars that have totally crippled our economy; have totally wiped out any hope we had of balancing any budgets for the next several decades; wars that are now encroaching on our Social Security system; wars that are sucking dry our treasury; wars that we are having to borrow money to keep them going; wars which have thrown us head first into a national debt snake pit that is 1.9 trillion dollars deep and full of venomous bankrupting snakes in the grass! We are borrowing money like crazy from China--we are so in debt to China we are almost a Chinese colony. What if the Commies foreclosed on our country?
We the American People have been hoodwinked. We've been sold down the river to the Global Corporate-ruled New World Order who really aren't worried at all about terrorists and weapons of mass destruction and al-Queda and fanatic Muslims--hell, they're some of the Global Market Place's best customers. Pappy Bush formed the Carlyle Group with his Saudi pals--the Carlyle Group tried to take over the world's gold market--and when that failed, they went into the arms business--Pappy made millions off the Carlyle Group, but, hey, he was simply pulling himself and his empire up by his bootstraps! [Note: The Existentialist Cowboy (a fellow West Texan) has a great column currently running on Conspiracies and George H.W. "Pappy" Bush's being a dangerous human being. Check the Blog List to the right of the post.]
We're being driven down, folks. The corporation is based on the same structure as the old plantation was in the time of the Great White Father's building this Christian nation blessed by the Big Daddy Christian God and creator himself up on the backs of Black slaves--those savages rounded up like cattle in Africa and brought here as nonhumans--mules, donkeys, monkeys, apes, coons, pickaninnies--Leander Perez, that great American-Confederate patriot who ruled Louisiana's Plaquemines Parish during the Civil Rights Movement days of the mid-60s--he made his living selling "The South Shall Rise Again" cigarette lighters and banners and flags and bumper stickers--called Black people lower than coons, why, even lower than the belly-dragging Lawsbanana alligator--"We shoot one them thar alley-gators if he comes up into our yard." Yes. A plantation: a place where planting is done. The plantation mastered by the planter and his family. Most of our famous White forefathers, those who were great Christian gentlemen, were planters. George Washington (who grew pot on his plantation) and Thomas Jefferson were both slave-holding planters. Most of the WHITE MEN who signed the Declaration of Independence FROM England were slaveholders, landholders, who lived in mansions on their plantations throughout the middle states and the southern states of the 13 Colonies. The planters didn't plant--the slaves did--under the masterful eye of their Old Massuhs and the Old Massuhs's many workforce superintendent Mr. Charleys who kept those savage slaves under some kind of order. A great plantation like a great corporation is dependent on CHEAP LABOR for its continuing success. In today's reckless-spending world of overblown billionaires and their wealth-grabbing companies, where do they find the cheap labor? Follow the corporations as they rip up their US operations and move them to...WHERE? Where there is cheap labor. Commie China. Vietnam. Malaysia, Singapore, and Indonesia. Mexico. Even illegal immigrant labor is smuggled into this country because it is CHEAP LABOR.
We will be paying out the nose for these G.W. Bush war follies for generations to come--and Obama is continuing to justify the administration of G.W. Bush and to carry on most of its economic and war policies. He's claiming a phony campaign promise--actually what he promised in the campaign was a complete withdrawal of our forces from Iraq immediately after he was elected--and then that got dragged out to a year--then dragged further out to 2 years--that promise got modified and remodified and then the Clintonistas took over and more problems than ever have now erupted and the cornered rats, the Dumbocrats, are now biting each other while under the attack of the highly toxic teabagger movement. Just imagine Sarah Palin as President of the USA. You're saying, "Come on, Wolf Man, get serious. Sarah Palin will never be president of the USA."
Way back in 1967, I was just out of college with an MA in Economics and Sociological Theory, I applied for teaching positions at several colleges around the country. I also had some hours on my PhD, too, so I looked pretty promising on paper--plus I had done a good job of graduate-assistant lecturing--I was a damn good lecturer--and I had been a part of a major sociological survey on mental health facilities throughout Texas. The most promising offer I got to my applications was a call from Santa Clara University just down the road to San Francisco from San Jose, where my wife and I were camping out with an old friend of mine from New Orleans until we could find a place of our own. The head of the Sociology Department there personally invited me to come to the university for an interview and get-acquainted session. After a very favorable and promising interview, the Sociology dude invited my wife and I to a staff party on the next Saturday afternoon in the Student Union Building. They were going to listen to Alan Watts's tapes and then have a sort of round-the-floor discussion of all subjects--wine and cheese and dips and chips--and just good clean academic party fun.
My wife and I endured Alan Watts and his trying to relate Western psychology with Eastern mysticism or Far Eastern psychology as he called it. Whoooo, boring. But then after they shut Alan off, the conversation came around to California politics. Ronald Reagan had announced in 1966 his candidacy for governor in the upcoming '67 gubernatorial race against Jerry Brown's old pappy, Edmund G. "Pat" Brown. Here's how a Conservative-Reagan-Praising Website describes this run of Reagan's:
Reagan moved immediately to capitalize on the momentum of the Goldwater speech [In Your Heart You Know He's Right] and began appearing before Republican gatherings in California and elsewhere within weeks of the 1964 election. By 1965, encouraged by conservative political leaders and right-wing businessmen in California, he had decided to run for governor; he formally announced his candidacy early in 1966. His opponent was the incumbent governor, Edmund G. Brown, a popular politician running for his third term. (He had defeated Richard Nixon four years earlier.) Brown spoke condescendingly of Reagan's inexperience and ridiculed his film career. But he was no match for Reagan's homespun magnetism. The Reagan campaign capitalized on popular anger at student demonstrations on the Berkeley campus of the University of California, and it portrayed Brown as an old-fashioned politician out of touch with the people. Reagan, in contrast, presented himself as an ordinary citizen fed up with politics and committed to making government more efficient and accountable. He defeated Brown in a landslide.
So here I was suddenly sitting on this floor of this student center at Santa Clara University discussing Ronald Reagan's chances of being the next governor of California. The most open-mouthed one of these academics, a transplated New Yorker, said, whiningly, "There's no way Ronald Reagan will be elected governor of California." "I don't know," I popped up. "Southern Californians love that ignorant bastard. Down in L.A., he's on fire and the L.A. racists and Master Baiters are chomping away at Pat Brown's reputation while Pat's chomping away at Mr. Reagan's acting career--you know Bongo was a greater actor than Reagan--and it's backfiring against him. L.A. and Southern California are hopelessly rightwinger--I mean, come on, the John Birch Society was started in Anaheim. All of Orange County are freaky White rightwinger racists." "But, hey, you're from Texas, you don't know anything about California politics. You're blinded by that Hollywood glitter. Up here in Northern California, we know Reagan hasn't got a chance in hell of winning the governorship from Pat Brown." "Bullshit," I said, rising up to my full broadchested 5' 10" height, "I have family in L.A., you New Yorker prick, I was just in L.A. two days ago and I saw Reagan's droopy old soon-to-be-Alzheimered face all over down there and on the radio its Reagan, Reagan, Reagan, a champion of the people of California who are tired of fucking Mexicans and Watts (South Central L.A.) Blacks and the fucking hippies at Berkeley--and Reagan says he's gonna fuck up the California university system...." "No, no, no," my Texas friend, you are totally off your rocker. California is a liberal Democratic state. Pat Brown will win--oh it'll be close, but Pat will win." "You wanna bet?" And he did. I bet him $100 that Reagan would be the next governor of California. History proves me right. So there, don't tell me Sarah Palin can't end up president of the USA.
for The Daily Growler